Author Archive
I’m running!
I’m back to running. Training for my 2nd 5K, which will happen here in town in August. It’ll be fun to run places I know.
Today, though, I am quite proud of having run all the way around the lake. 4.3 miles in a 66 minutes. Not bad…
Love & War: Week 2 (Nathan)
Days…and then weeks…got away from me. Sorry everyone. Without further ado, here’s my 2nd chapter writeup!
Chapter 2: Love and War
If this were a CD, chapter 2 would be a title track. I didn’t actually realize the chapter was named the same as the book until I just typed the header above, and having done so, it actually puts the chapter in an even clearer light. Chapter 1 was written to drive home their status as real people, with a very real marriage; chapter 2 begins the real meat of the book.
Much of the chapter focused on showing the correlation between marriage and the overarching story of the bible. Right away, they point out that the bible begins and ends with marriages — first Adam and Eve in Genesis, then Christ and the Church in Revelation. Marriage is very important in the Bible, and there is a good reason for this. They explain that marriage is a very clear picture of the relational nature of God and that marriage is actually a passion play, depicting the relationship between “Jesus and his beloved” (34).
The title of the book (and chapter), “Love and War” is a reference to the idea that marriage, like the story of the Bible, is a love story set against a background of War. God loves us, and the Bible shows how he pursues us, but it also reveals that this pursuit happens within an ongoing battle for the hearts of people. The stories of our marriages are set within this same world, written “by the same Author” (35).
I like the idea that in the light of the challenges presented by life in this imperfect world, “marriage is meant to throw the balance of power on our side” (30). More than just being a means to understanding the love God has for us, marriage is actually a critical aide to our success in life — Amy is it with me, and together, we are stronger than we would be alone.
But, marriage is dangerous, too. Although it sets up husbands and wives to support each other through the battles of life, in doing so, it makes us vulnerable and makes it critically important that we take marriage very, very seriously:
Pause a moment; take a deep breath. Let that reality sink in a little deeper — you are the human being who plays the most significant role in your spouse’s life. It is not your spouse’s mother or father. It is not your spouse’s favorite teacher, author, or pastor. It is you. It is a sobering truth, isn’t it. You are on holy ground. You matter more than you thought (38).
It seems a little bleak to look at the world as a battleground, but we people are wired up to thrive in the face of challenge. We want and need to “fight some great battle together.” (31). It’s exciting to face that and know that Amy is by my side.
Love & War: Week 1 (Nathan)
Chapter 1: Remembering What We Wanted
After the very well-written introduction, I was expecting chapter 1 to be good, and I wasn’t disappointed. I was, however, very surprised: This is a book about marriage. Written by a married couple. The last thing I expected was for them to reveal that 2 years into their marriage, they were considering divorce. It didn’t happen — they went on to relate a story about their 25th wedding anniversary — but I wasn’t expecting that sort of down-and-dirty reality in chapter 1.
This is a book written by imperfect people about the very real problems that confront married couples. It means a lot that they can be this open about the struggles they experienced in their own marriage.
There were a number of key points in this first chapter that struck home with me. The first was that when boy meets girl and they get married, they both enter the relationship as “deeply broken people.” No one can claim differently. Everyone is imperfect in at least some ways. In addition to dealing with the work of a marriage relationship, these personal issues must still be addressed!
All those fairy tales about a boy and girl who find themselves thrown together into an adventure in a dangerous land, and how they must come to work together if they have any hope of making it through, but they are both carrying a tragic flaw, an Achilles’ heel that pricks the other constantly and they barely do make it through — those fairy tales pretty much have it right.
The second thing I noticed was that though I can definitely see that I am a broken person, I am broken in very different ways than the authors. I see far more insecurity in myself than John relates. He identifies one of his main issues early on as being too overachieving and narcissistic. I, on the other hand, feel that I do not push myself hard enough, content to let things happen as they will.
The next thing that jumped out at me was that the authors consider having a “shared life” and “living for the same things” as key triumphs in their marriage. It’s not enough to simply be there for each other, supporting each others’ individual goals. As a couple, you must be pursuing the same prize, working together and not simply backing each other up. I want that for Amy and me.
Finally, they wrap up the chapter by asking us as reader what we dreamed our marriage would be like before we said I do and even back when we were kids. I identify with John’s dreams quite a bit, especially his first one: “I wanted to be believed in.” I too wanted (and still deeply desire) that.
I also look back and see that I had always wanted my wife to participate in “some grand adventure” with me. If I think back to my adolescent and teen years, thinking about books and movies that tickled my early understanding of what a relationship with a girl might be, I remember things like Goonies and the Princess Bride. Relationship that grew stronger as the couple (or couple-to-be) overcame very real obstacles in their adventure.
Chapter one got me thinking. I’m excited about chapter 2.
Isaac update
Amy and Isaac are in Waconia at the Hospital today. Isaac woke up as floppy as he was yesterday and didn’t keep down even the first fluids we gave him. We decided it was time to get in ASAP. The ER staff checked him over and did put him on an IV drip by early morning. He took two bags of fluid, but still couldn’t keep down the oz of Pedalyte they tried to give him afterward.
They’re admitting him now, just to keep him on fluids while they wait for the bloodwork. I’m not there, but Amy says she really thinks it’s just the stomach bug hitting him particularly hard. There’s no fever, ear infection or anything else at this point. Probably just a matter of keeping him hydrated and letting him work past the virus, now.
She says he’s starting to get some color back, but he’s not been able to get much sleep yet — every time he starts into a nice block of sleep he gets poked or prodded…
More simple math
2 parents – 2 sick parents = Ethan running things around here.
Isaac’s still not himself, but Amy and I have now picked up the same bug. Nasty little thing, too…
No pictures for this one — believe me, you do not want to see me today 
New Site!
We have shifted from Blogger over to WordPress. We like what we can do with the new software, but things will be a bit messy during the transition — all of the articles made it over just fine, but we’re taking this opportunity to go back and clean up our tags and categories.
The bad news is that comments posted through the comment system we added to Blogger a while back will not make it over to the new site…
Fun with cameras
I borrowed a camera from Crown today. After all, it’s part of my job as IT Director to play with…erm…familiarize myself with the technology at Crown.
I think Isaac was in awe of me. He usually is…
I managed to catch a slightly less scrunchy, squinty smile than normal from Audrey, for once! …says the man who winks every time he smiles…
This is my son. He sometimes lets me take pictures of him. But not often…
This is for Lego Batman and Lego Indiana Jones.
This is for Lego Star Wars
Mom, Please Don’t Bug Me While I’m Playing My Game
Look at mama!
Ethan, look at me with your eyes!
Oh well. Isaac, smile for me!
I love that cheesey smile (complete with bottom lip out nose pointed up in the air)!
Recently, this is a typical sight at 6:30pm
Isaac is completely passed out in random places after having his last bottle of the day. He’s so tired. His crankyness may be due to the fact that he has a nasty cold now and another tooth about to poke through.
Thoughts on Insecurity
Thoughts on Insecurity
A few weeks ago, I ordered the book, So Long Insecurity, by Beth Moore. On a whim, I ordered 2 and sent one to my mother-in-law, too. I know! What kind of crazy woman sends a book on insecurity to their mother-in-law. The funny thing was that I didn’t spend much time thinking about whether or not I should do it BEFORE I already went through the steps to send it to her. It was only when it was too late that I started to think, “Oh no. I hope I didn’t just send a message to my mother-in-law that communicated that I thought she had issues with insecurity.” So, as you can see, I, myself have a few (or a lot!) of issues with insecurity, as evidenced by my second-guessing in this process. Anyway. . . moving along from there.
My mother-in-law, that many of my readers refer to as “Mom” or “Chris” loved the book and has finished it and she wasn’t offended at all! I don’t think it took more than a couple of weeks for her to get through the entire thing and she loved it! And, from what I’ve read of it, I do to.
Everyone has hangups of some kind or another in regard to insecurity, but women seem to have it down to a science. In chapter 3, the idea of a “prominent false positive” is discussed. It’s the one thing that you (or I) think would make us more secure in all things. Think of a person you look at and perceive as secure. What is it that they have that you don’t? How would you finish this statement?-
“You know, ____fill in the blank with name_____, people who don’t know you very well would never be able to imagine that you struggle with insecurity. After all. . . “
What would you say?
. . . you have so many friends.
. . . you have a spouse to take care of you.
. . . you don’t have to worry about finances.
And the crazy thing is that person, who has the thing that we think would make us more secure, is still insecure themselves because someone else has something that they don’t have that they are sure would solve their problem.
I’ve been trying to think of what my “prominent false positive” is. I don’t know if I am sure what mine is yet. I plan to blog more on this as I work through the last half of the book.
What do you think? Does any of this resonate with you or sound interesting?
